Possibly the most amusing fake news item Saturday morning came from The New York Times. Under the rubric “Iran War Live Updates,” a headline screamed, “Iran’s Military Says It Has Reimposed ‘Strict Control’ of Strait of Hormuz.” To which an inquiring mind wants to know, “What Iran military?” It’s gone, Kemo Sabe. The floating bits are at the bottom of the sea. The terrestrial bits have been crushed, blasted, pulverized, or incinerated. Ditto most of the bits that flew. Which is why a healthy skepticism must severely discount the Times’s breathless comment that “A shipping monitor run by the British Navy said Saturday that it had received a report of Iran’s Revolutionary Guards firing at a tanker in the strait.” Click the link. What it says is that someone told someone else that something “was reported” to have happened, but no one and nothing was hit or damaged.
I don’t mean to single out the paper that President Trump accurately, if impolitely, calls “the failing New York Times.” About all things Trump, The Wall Street Journal is just as bad. Between February 28, when Operation Epic Fury began, and last week, when President Trump allowed Iran to lift its head out of the water briefly in order to surrender, the WSJ has run countless stories explaining how, despite appearances, Iran was actually winning the conflict. On Saturday, the Journal greeted Iran’s braggadocio about the Strait of Hormuz just as enthusiastically as did the Times. If your version of those papers came with a magic subtext mood reader, you would have been able to hear the excited Molly Bloom-like cries wafting off the page: “Yes! Yes! Yes! Please let it be so! Please let something bad happen to US forces so we can wipe that grin off Trump’s face! Please!”
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